How To Get Rid Of Social Phobias And Build Self Confidence

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How To Get Rid Of Social Phobias And Build Self Confidence

Self confidence is a psychological and emotional state of mind that responds to an individual’s need for recognition and self-acceptance. It’s one of the oldest and most studied concepts in psychology. It describes a positive but also realistic perception somebody has of himself or herself and of his or her abilities. Thus, people with self confidence usually have a better idea of what they are able to achieve and will be more likely to be successful in what they attempt. They are able to more easily admit and learn from their failures.

On the contrary, a lack of confidence may deter you from believing your actions or decisions will later work out the way you had planned. It can hence prevent the improvement of executive skills, strategic and management capacities all of which are necessary and mandatory things in today’s business world. The pre-occupation with how others will judge your work can also make you become excessively self-critical, which can distract you from tasks you would have otherwise been perfectly able to do.

Low self confidence will also affect your social life, as people with low self confidence tend to stay in their “comfort zone” and fear the risk of being rejected. This is called social phobia and presents a high degree of co-morbidity with low self confidence, but also other psychological diseases such as depression. People with low self confidence are scared of the judgment of others and will avoid meeting new people, which can result in isolation and even less self confidence. Low self confidence is a vicious circle that is difficult to break.

To the contrary, because they have faith in their own abilities, people with self confidence are able to do what they feel is right and don’t feel the need for the approval of their peers. They are also able to inspire confidence: your boss, employees, customers, friends or relatives are more likely to trust you or what you are telling them if you appear self-confident.

Many experiences can contribute to low self confidence. New research indicates that parenting style has a major impact on the development of the self confidence of a child. Corporal and mental abuses in childhood are for instance the worse for somebody’s self confidence, as well as family conflicts and divorce. Overprotective parents may also contribute to a child’s social phobia and hamper the independence necessary to develop self confidence. Failures and successes, for instance at school or in one’s professional life, also play an important role: losing a job or failing a class are among the numerous experiences that will negatively affect your self confidence.

There are however methods to overcome these bad experiences and increase self confidence. The first step to develop self confidence would be to learn to know yourself and your strengths. Acknowledging the fact that you are allowed not to be perfect and cannot be the best in everything you do will help you gain self confidence. Accepting yourself as you are is the key to gaining self confidence. But improving self confidence also requires that you start taking risks and giving yourself credit for your achievements. This is very simple advice which will help you build self confidence. You might also find several books which will claim they can help you gain self confidence, however not all of them are reliable.

Many people have low self confidence or are only capable of gaining self confidence in one or a certain number of areas of their lives because they constantly try to get other people’s approval and are afraid that they could fail. Many factors, such as childhood traumas, can explain why some people cannot have the wholesome life of a self confident person. Such persons also do not always know how to gain self confidence. But improving self confidence can now easily and effectively be done thanks to hypnosis and NLP.

As we have seen social phobia and low self confidence can be triggered by bad experiences or unconscious fears that may be difficult to overcome through self persuasion only. Confidence hypnosis and NLP on the other hand are able to get to the unconscious part of our mind and alter belief systems to boost self confidence. They are powerful tools that will help you address your fears and trust yourself to develop self confidence.

Self-Hypnosis for building self-confidence has been used for a few decades and has shown significant results in building self confidence. In a hypnotic state, reaching unconscious thoughts is a lot easier and, through hypnotic suggestion, you will be able to replace your negative thought patterns with positive ones to boost self confidence.

Alan B. Densky is a hypnotherapist and NLP Practitioner. He offers hypnosis CD’s for social phobias and self confidence. His hypnosis for self confidence CD’s were reviewed by independents in the UK. Visit his Neuro-VISION self hypnosis site to watch free hypnosis videos. In her video “The Fastest Way to Build Self-Confidence”, Dr.Sharon Melnick shares the secrets of her research at Harvard Medical School as to why people get in their own way. Send an email – ask questions and tell me your suggestions for other topics that you would like to be covered in new upcoming videos if you’re on Twitter – Follow me Discover more about how you too can build Self-Confidence… Sign up for one of her coaching sessions live this week in NYC at

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